Creating yourself

We often hear the phrase "finding yourself" thrown around, as if our true selves are hidden treasures waiting to be unearthed. But what if we've been looking at it all wrong? What if, instead of finding ourselves, we're actually in the process of creating ourselves?

Where would you “find” yourself?

The idea of "finding yourself" suggests that there's a pre-existing, fully-formed version of you out there, just waiting to be discovered. But life isn't a scavenger hunt, and you're not a lost item. You're a work in progress, constantly evolving and changing.

Finding yourself gives an illusion that you need to “go somewhere” to find the best version of yourself. And for most people, it made them believe that they won’t ever be able to do it because they got stuck with a job, because they can’t leave the city, and so on.

But if we shift our perspective from “finding” to “creating”, we unlock a world of possibilities. Creating ourselves implies agency, choice, and the power to shape our own identities. It's an active process, not a passive one.

It starts from within.

What to look for

As we navigate through life, we encounter various experiences, ideas, and challenges. These become the raw materials from which we craft our identities:

1. Likes and Dislikes: Through trial and error, we discover what resonates with us and what doesn't.
2. Passions: Among the things we enjoy, we find those that truly ignite our spirits.
3. Dreams: Our passions often lead to aspirations and goals that drive us forward.
4. Values: As we pursue our dreams, we develop a clearer sense of what matters most to us.

How to create yourself

The beauty of creating yourself is that it's an ongoing process. There's no fixed endpoint, no moment where you suddenly become "complete." Instead, you're constantly refining and reimagining who you are and who you want to be.

Creating yourself is more straightforward than you might think. It's about:

1. Exploring your interests
2. Cultivating your passions
3. Pursuing your dreams
4. Reflecting on your experiences
5. Making conscious choices about who you want to be

When we talk about "creating" ourselves, we acknowledge our own power and responsibility in shaping our identities. It's empowering, reminding us that we're the authors of our own stories.

On the other hand, "finding" ourselves can sometimes feel like a futile search for something that may not exist. If we don't stumble upon that elusive "true self," we can feel lost or incomplete.

You are your own creation

The most beautiful part of this journey is realizing that the answer has always been within you. You're not searching for a hidden treasure; you're sculpting a masterpiece, and you're both the artist and the art.

So, let's stop trying to "find" ourselves and start embracing the joy of creating ourselves. After all, life isn't about discovering who you are – it's about deciding who you want to become.

I hope you find this insightful. Remember:

It's not going to be easy,
But it's not impossible.

Your friend,
Brian.